The Ultimate Balancing Act

All working parents have experienced the challenge of balancing work and kids for several generations, this is nothing new. However, since the global pandemic hit, many parents have added the title of teacher to their existing roles of parent and employee now performing all of these roles at once in their homes. Throw in the fact that this may last another six to eight weeks, if not more, and it can be overwhelming to say the least.

It seems that we are all in the same storm, just on different boats. My boat has me and my four children (ages 7, 9, 10 and 12) in it with my husband, who is still reporting to work daily. We are finding our way and we have good days and not so good days, which I am guessing many of you may also be experiencing. In the spirit of it ‘taking a village’ and all, I wanted to share some of my thoughts and techniques in the hope that it will help some of you navigate this balancing act.

“My boat has me and my four children (ages 7, 9, 10 and 12) in it with my husband, who is still reporting to work daily.”

Every age group of children comes with its own challenges. Young children can be incredibly unpredictable. A night of no sleep or a large crash from another room as their curiosity gets the better of them can turn your day into something unexpected. School-age kiddos now come with distance learning curricula, video calls with teachers, and questions about assignments. Young adults are working their way through high school virtual classes, might be back home from college or even dealing with work furloughs and layoffs at the same time!

No matter the ages of your kids, a little planning can go a long way, even in small pockets of time. Here are some questions to consider in your planning:

• What time of day do you do your best work?
  Are you a night owl and work best after the kids are in bed? Are you a morning person that is up before everybody else? Work with your natural clock and allow yourself time when you are at your ‘peak’ to get some tasks completed.
• What needs done?
  Write down your list of items that need completed and then prioritize them. This is a great activity to do each evening to plan for the next day. The trick here is to not overwhelm yourself with a long list of “to-do’s” for a small pocket of time. Break your list out with a few “must’-do’s” for each window of time you have dedicated for work. Do yourself a favor and write these lists down! Don’t add extra pressure or work by trying to memorize what you need to do. Create lists in a planner, notes on the fridge, on a whiteboard, on your computer or anywhere you will be sure to see them.
• What times during the day do you have available to work?
  Consider nap times, meal times, any scheduled calls for you or the kids. What blocks of time are open to get tasks completed? Consider the amount of time certain tasks take and fit them in where you are able. When are the best times to fit in a load of laundry or answer some emails versus times that allow you to work on bigger, more time consuming projects?

Now that you have a plan in place, the next trick is to be ready to change it. Being flexible and fluid with the ebbs and flows of your day will prove to be a great stress-saver for you! It is also a great way to help your kids learn how to be flexible and adjust as life changes.

When my family’s shelter at home experience began five weeks ago, I implemented the following schedule for my kids. Some days, we are right on schedule. Some days, the schedule is out the door, and that is ok. We use the schedule as a structure to start with and adjust as needed as we go. As the distance learning curriculum from the kids’ school changes, we adjust the schedule. When I notice the kids are having a rough day and everything seems to be a struggle, we adjust. Remember that you are likely to get interrupted when you have children in the home, but what’s important is to bookmark what you were doing and come back to the task when you are able. If you keep an organized list of the tasks you wanted to get done, you’ll have something to jog your memory if you get side-tracked.

The most difficult thing I have faced in all of this, is dealing with guilt. I have felt guilty for not focusing enough on work or not focusing enough on the kids or not being involved enough in their schoolwork. We have to give ourselves grace and understanding as we would others. It is important to understand that we are in a difficult time and nobody expects us to be perfect.

“I have felt guilty for not focusing enough on work or not focusing enough on the kids or not being involved enough in their schoolwork. We have to give ourselves grace and understanding as we would others.”

Allow yourself and your kids to feel all the feelings, have good days and bad ones and take time to just breathe when necessary. Be open in communicating with your work team, let them know if you need to move some things around to accommodate for the multiple schedules you are juggling. Be open about how you are doing and ask for help when needed. You’ve got this, I’ve got this, we’ve got this! We would love to hear from you on how you are balancing everything; email us at hello@welcoa.org!

ABOUT THE CONTRIBUTOR
Lori Thomas // Member Education Manager • WELCOA

Lori brings a unique level of expertise and perspective with a diverse background in wellness, workplace culture, and employee experience. She is a compassionate and driven woman who has a passion for helping others and radiates positivity. As WELCOA’s Member Education Manager, she provides creative insight to enhancing the member experience.